Jan 1, 2013, 11:00 AM EDT
Happy New Year!
Thanks for visiting PHT on a day normally reserved for finding your car keys and dignity. Because you’ve all been such good sports, we’re going to do you a solid and kick the year off right…by being positive.
Look, we know the NHL lockout’s been a drag. (Also acceptable: “sad” or “wholly unnecessary.”) But that doesn’t mean we can’t find the bright side — y’know, the parts of the work stoppage that make you realize hey, some good things have come out of the last 108 days.
Granted, not many good things. But some.
Okay, six. There have been exactly six good things.
And here they are.
Way more time to follow other sports
Like the NBA. We can’t remember the last time we got to watch professional hoops on a regular basis. Did you know the SuperSonics moved to Oklahoma City? Seattle basketball fans will really miss Tom Chambers.
We’ve also been enjoying college football’s many, many bowl games. Central Florida’s victory over Ball State in the Beef ‘O’ Brady’s Bowl was very impressive. We thought that game would be closer, but we guess Knights quarterback Blake Bortles had other plans!
Google Translate and its wacky Google translations
One trick to being really good hockey journalist guys: Go straight to the source (or so we’re told.)
So, rather than wait for a proper translation of a European team announcing its big NHL signing, the trick is to copy text off the team website and plug it into Google Translate.
After all, any old website can tell you Ales Hemsky signed in the Czech Extraliga. But only Google Translate will tell you in such an enjoyable way, like “Hemsky agree yes to Pardubice consummate upon contract. On Tuesday join. Successful much oil man has been, though often injury.”
That guy Guy Serota
When federal mediators entered labor negotiations, a crack staff was assigned to the case. That included one Guy Serota, who was quickly unassigned due to a rather sketchy personal Twitter account.
Featuring bad jokes, foul language, an infatuation with Sarah Silverman and links to videos of himself (essentially ruining his “I WAS HACKED!” defense), Serota’s account didn’t exactly undermine the mediation process — let’s face it, nobody figured it would work in the first place — but it did lead to a bunch of hockey writers writing about a man and his “Ass Mode” shirt.
“The Italian second division? That exists?”
How else besides the lockout would we have learned about all the wild and crazy places guys can play hockey professionally? For example, did you know Denmark’s top professional league, the AL-Bank Ligaen, is sponsored by Dong Energy? We do.
And did you know Dale Weise is an offensive machine in the Dutch league? That must not be a very good league.
Despite being out of work, many NHLers are still living awesome lives that render them almost completely out of touch with the general public. And they took the time to show us!
BizNasty can’t find a decent seamstress outside of Barney’s New York.
Learning the difference between “decertification” and “disclaimer of interest”
It’s weird, we were always under the impression they were the same thing, but it turns out they aren’t. Yes, both are ways to dissolve a union; however, decertification takes longer and is a more formal process than a disclaimer of interest. Cool, right?
It’s also been interesting to read about antitrust law as it pertains to professional sports. We never thought we’d get that opportunity when we became sports writers. We thought we’d have to write about sports all the time.
So that’s our list of six good things about the lockout. (Full disclosure: we tried to think of 10 but fell four short.)
Many thanks to all our readers for continuing to visit PHT. Here’s to a fantastic 2013. Go Knights!
- Injuries piling up as preseason schedule begins 11
- Report: Fedorov denies contract offer was made to Johansen 7
- Report: Johansen has gotten no shortage of KHL offers 36
- Update: Drouin out with upper body injury, not expected to miss preseason 1
- Report: NHL officials to participate in preseason without new CBA 1
- Evander Kane: I know I can score 50 goals 14
- ‘C’-less Thornton comes out swing against Wilson’s ‘tomorrow team’ talk 18
- Joe Sakic’s now general manager in name too 6
- Update: Giroux out two weeks with lower-body injury 26
- Update: Crosby on ice with Penguins teammates Friday, leaves early 5
- Heeeeeere’s Johnny! Davidson shreds Johansen’s agent for ‘baffling, nonsensical’ contract demands (65)
- Jackets reveal Johansen offers — including an eight year, $46M deal (55)
- Will the NHL publicize divers? (48)
- No icing on the PK? The USHL will see how that looks (43)
- Just how damaging are heated negotiations between Jackets, RFA Johansen? (38)