Skip to content

Here are this season’s five scraggliest NHL headshots

Jan 28, 2013, 1:31 PM EDT

Prior to every NHL campaign, teams put their players through a bunch of boring administrative stuff — physicals, paperwork and, most importantly for the purposes of this post, headshots.

The headshot is a curious thing. It’s not often used, so players tend to treat it like high school picture day. Show up in whatever shape you’re in, completely oblivious to the fact someone is going to capture your image, sit down, stare at the camera and hope it turns out, you know, not awful.

Of course, the whole “show up in whatever shape you’re in” part can lead to some, uh, interesting results.

Like in the case of the following five NHLers:

Brent Burns

This one has been making the rounds for a while (see here) so there’s really no need to go into great detail about the bushman of San Jose.

Here he be:

source:

Greg Zanon

I like the juxtaposition at play. How can one man’s head be so immaculately clean, yet his beard look like it was glued on, then sent through a wind tunnel?

source:

Rick DiPietro

He may or may not have spent the lockout following Phish around in an ’83 Volkswagen bus.

source:

Kris Versteeg

The strength of Steeger’s mustache growth seems to be in strips directly below his nostrils, which is weirdly fascinating.

source:

Nikolai Khabibulin

And rounding it out is the ‘Bulin Wall, looking far more disheveled than he did in his infamous 2010 DUI mugshot.

source:

Now, for an entirely different set of headshots, check out this gallery of New Jersey Devils. That is the cleanest-shaven hockey team ever.

We mentioned last year about how Brian Burke waxed poetic over Lou Lamoriello’s strict grooming policies, but just to refresh:

Burke (courtesy the National Post):

“When I played at Providence College, we played West Point, we played the U.S. military academy, at West Point. Now, this is the ’70s, we’re playing teams with guys who have hair down to here [points to shoulders]. Our hair is not allowed to touch our ear.

“Like, I just got a haircut today so that Lou won’t call me and tell me I need a haircut.”

Burke pointed to his freshly trimmed sideburns and continued.

“So we’re playing the cadets. We’re at centre ice and their guys skate over: ‘Hey man, what’s with the hair? We HAVE to do this. What’s with you guys?’

And we’re like, ‘we HAVE to do it, too.”

All of New Jersey’s haircuts are believed to be modeled on this example:

source:

Latest Posts
  1. Video: Burrows ‘surprised, upset’ he received a major penalty for hit on Gaustad

    Apr 1, 2015, 1:41 AM EDT

    Getty Images

    Could the Vancouver forward be facing further discipline from the league?

  2. ‘We just didn’t have it tonight': Lightning lose to Maple Leafs

    Apr 1, 2015, 1:17 AM EDT

    Getty Images

    Tampa Bay is in a battle for the Atlantic Division.

  3. Canucks’ Bieksa penalized for illegal check to the head

    Mar 31, 2015, 9:38 PM EDT

    Getty Images

    Could Vancouver’s veteran defenseman be looking at a suspension?

  4. NHL bringing back draft pick compensation this offseason for hiring away coaches, GMs

    Mar 31, 2015, 7:49 PM EDT

    Colorado Avalanche v Detroit Red Wings Getty Images

    3rd-round pick if it happens after the season, 2nd-rounder if it happens in-season.

  5. Contract stalemate continues between Columbus, prized prospect Reilly

    Mar 31, 2015, 6:59 PM EDT

    2014 NCAA Division I Men's Ice Hockey Championship - Semifinals Getty Images

    University of Minnesota blueliner inching closer to free agency.

  6. Bettman shoots down idea of renaming NHL awards

    Mar 31, 2015, 6:41 PM EDT

    2014 NHL Awards - Arrivals Getty Images

    So the Hart will not, as some have suggested, become the Gretzky.

  7. Versteeg misses Kane

    Mar 31, 2015, 5:30 PM EDT

    Toronto Maple Leafs v Chicago Blackhawks Toronto Maple Leafs v Chicago Blackhawks

    Blackhawks duo “had a good thing going.”

  8. Pressure’s on the Jets, who don’t want to blow it now

    Mar 31, 2015, 3:38 PM EDT

    Minnesota Wild v Winnipeg Jets Getty Images

    Could really use a win tonight versus the Rangers.

  9. Despite trend of visitors winning Game 7, Laviolette wants home ice for Preds

    Mar 31, 2015, 2:40 PM EDT

    Peter Laviolette AP

    “I can speak from experience that home ice matters.”

  10. Goalie nods: Hamburglar goes for Ottawa

    Mar 31, 2015, 2:13 PM EDT

    Andrew Hammond Andrew Hammond

    News and notes from around the crease…

Featured video

Can anything stop Tampa Bay?
Top 10 NHL Player Searches
  1. K. Letang (1856)
  2. D. Dubnyk (1729)
  3. A. Steen (1698)
  4. H. Lundqvist (1669)
  5. A. Hammond (1657)
  1. M. St. Louis (1610)
  2. P. Datsyuk (1588)
  3. B. Little (1514)
  4. E. Malkin (1512)
  5. S. Weber (1370)