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According to Kings GM, Columbus can take it up with science

Feb 2, 2012, 2:52 PM EDT

Dean Lombardi Getty Images

Los Angeles Kings GM Dean Lombardi has weighed in with the most factual, and dorkiest, explanation of what happened to the clock during Wednesday’s controversial 3-2 win over Columbus.

Here’s what he told ESPN via email (all sic’d):

“Those clocks are sophisticated instruments that calculate time by measuring electrical charges called coulombs — given the rapidity and volume of electrons that move through the measuring device the calibrator must adjust at certain points which was the delay you see — the delay is just recalibrating for the clock moving too quickly during the 10 – 10ths of a second before the delay — this insures that the actual playing time during a period is exactly 20 minutes.

That is not an opinion — that is science — amazing devise quite frankly.”

Having re-read Lombardi’s email several times…

1) I’m hoping “The coulombs didn’t recalibrate” catches on. “Hey, did you get my email?” “No.” “Oh weird, guess the coulombs didn’t recalibrate.”

2) Do you think Lombardi offhandedly knew all these intricate details about the Staples Center scoreboard? I like to think so. I also like to think he followed up that email with a 4,569-word missive on the arena’s Wi-Fi capabilities, written entirely from memory.

3) Since when does science prove anything?

  1. cannonblast14 - Feb 2, 2012 at 3:22 PM

    Too bad he cant just come out and say there was an error, especially in such an obvious case such as this. Shame

  2. lsxphotog - Feb 2, 2012 at 3:28 PM

    SCIENCE!

  3. bigtganks - Feb 2, 2012 at 3:46 PM

    Dude, Lombardi, please stop. Start counting down from 10 with the clock. It doesn’t recalibrate or realign the couloumbs or whatever you just said.

    It was stopped for a moment when it shouldn’t have. Take the high road, admit it, state you’re going to ensure this is corrected. Don’t go Bill Nye the Science Guy on us and think you’ve outsmarted us…

    You just make yourself look stupid. “amazing devise quite frankly”. stfu

  4. barroomhero80 - Feb 2, 2012 at 3:58 PM

    you smart guys ever think he just might be blowing smoke? get over it… kings won suck it up big boys

  5. solador78 - Feb 2, 2012 at 4:02 PM

    Lombardi forgot to explain the biology and physics behind the timekeeper’s finger pushing a button.

    The NHL should just install sensors so that timekeepers, goal “judges” and Colin Campbell can be replaced by computers.

    • danphipps01 - Feb 2, 2012 at 4:26 PM

      Can we build a soulless cyborg abomination to replace Gary Bettman, too?

      It’ll be exactly as evil as the real thing, but it’ll be cooler because it’s a robot.

  6. bigtganks - Feb 2, 2012 at 4:25 PM

    I’m memorizing this schpill so I can use it next time I’m late for work.

    “…see, given the rapidity and volume of electrons that move through the measuring device the calibrator must adjust to…”

  7. ron05342 - Feb 2, 2012 at 4:32 PM

    Hmmmmm…..

    Coloumbs.

    Columbus.

    I am speechless.

    • kopy - Feb 2, 2012 at 4:53 PM

      It’s like the scene at the end of “The Usual Suspects” where the detective drops his coffee mug.

  8. elvispocomo - Feb 2, 2012 at 4:34 PM

    I guess he can use that when the Kings struggle in the playoffs (assuming they make it). “We didn’t factor in enough coulombs to make it happen, and we ran out of time.”

  9. yettyskills - Feb 2, 2012 at 5:06 PM

    Dean Lombardi just pwned everyone crying foul.
    The 3rd period was 20:00 exactly in the end.

    Moving on

    • solador78 - Feb 2, 2012 at 5:25 PM

      Did you audit the whole period?

      Maybe the timekeeper was late on a previous whistle somewhere and there could have been enough time for a Blue Jacket equalizer.

      • yettyskills - Feb 2, 2012 at 8:23 PM

        Its the display of time being corrected by the timing system. It happens all the time, this is going to be a non story soon.

  10. dougr42 - Feb 2, 2012 at 5:46 PM

    Mike, you’re the best writer on PHT. Seriously. You’re funny and know proper sentence structure. Keep it up!

  11. jkaflagg - Feb 2, 2012 at 6:33 PM

    Uh, guys ? You can literally see Lombardi’s tongue piercing thru his cheek from here……After being ripped off several times by the NHL “war room” in the past few years, Dean was undoubtedly reveling in getting a bad call go his way for once……

  12. hockinj25 - Feb 2, 2012 at 8:40 PM

    LA is pretty much guaranteed the 7 or 8 spot and Columbus is Columbus so it doesn’t really matter

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