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A tour of some of the most tasteless tattoos in hockey fandom

Oct 15, 2010, 6:36 PM EDT

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I’ve written nearly 2,000 posts for Pro Hockey Talk, followed the sport obsessively for years and basically cannot go a day without at least discussing the NHL in passing. Yet as devoted as I am to hockey, I could never imagine committing to a tattoo for the sport.

(Granted, I’m ink-free, so perhaps I’m just commitment phobic.)

Other hockey fans aren’t so shy about wearing their passions on their sleeves. Literally. Marty Vance put together another great post full of horrible hockey-related tattoos today. Fair warning: his post and some of these tattoos might be a little on the “NSFW” (not safe for work) side. Here are some of the highlights … or should I say, some of the lowest of the low.

Note: all of these images came from Vance’s post.

Snide remarks: Nothing says commitment (or foolishness) like getting a tattoo on your head. There’s a sincere part of me that hopes this is either a Photoshop job or a temporary thing. It brings out my inner-grandparent: “How is he going to get a job?”

Snide remarks: As Vance noted, disparaging another team’s logo is a clear sign of an inferiority complex. Few teams have little brother syndrome quite like the Nashville Predators do with the Detroit Red Wings. Although after being in second place for years, now they have baby brother syndrome because the Chicago Blackhawks pushed them to third place (at best). Not sure if there’s enough room in the Predators’ mouth for a tomahawk, though.

Snide remarks: This tattoo corners the market on obscure hockey moments. It’s a reference to Max Talbot making a “shush” gesture to the Philadelphia Flyers in game six of their 2009 playoff series, after losing a fight that nonetheless seemed to rile the Pittsburgh Penguins up on their way to a comeback victory. Seems like a great idea for an avatar on Penguins blogs, but as a permanent part of your body? Dubious.

Snide remarks: Yup, that’s right. Hockey sticks form the crucifix for the oddest mix of religious and puck-based devotion I’ve ever seen. Is this in bad taste or even blasphemous? I don’t know, but I’ll just go ahead and be stunned.

So, those are some of the worst hockey-related tattoos in the universe. Make sure to read the whole post to see even more ridiculous designs (and check out the previous version) and giggle at Vance’s clever commentary. Again, it might be something to read once you get home from work, though.

Oh, and a word to the wise: there’s nothing wrong with showing your eternal devotion to your favorite team, but be at least slightly smart about it. Keep it simple (maybe your favorite player’s number, a simple puck/stick-based design or just the standard team logo) and easy to cover up for job interviews. Remember, it’s cool to be super-unique when it comes to choosing a jersey to wear, but when it comes to tattoos, you’re better off avoiding the road less traveled.

  1. kyleortonsarm - Jun 16, 2011 at 1:10 AM

    For some reason I personally know three different people with the Philadelphia Eagles logo tattooed on their bodies. I’m not sure what it is about that terrible football team that demands such devotion.

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